A young boy says to his father “Dad, our math teacher is asking to see you.” “What happened?” The father asks. “Well, she asked me, ‘how much is 7 * 9?’ I answered ’63’ , then she asked, ‘and 9 * 7?’ So I asked ‘what’s the bloody difference?’ “Indeed, what is the difference?” asks … Read more
Three women: one engaged, one married and one a mistress are chatting over lunch and the conversation turns to their relationships. They decide that night to surprise their men. All three would wear a black leather bra and thong, stiletto heels, and a mask over their eyes. A few days later they met. The engaged … Read more
Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, they are met by St. Peter. He says, ‘Sisters, you all led such exemplary lives that the Lord is granting you six months to go back to earth and be anyone you wish to be. The first nun says, “I want to be … Read more
One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company. He passed the first interview. The director did the last interview and made the last decision. The director discovered from the resume that the youth’s academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate … Read more
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband came into the kitchen. “Careful,” he said, “Careful! Put in some more oil! Oh my GOD! You’re cooking too many at once. Too many! Turn them! Turn them now! You need more oil. Oh my God! Where are we going … Read more
After 15 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to take another woman out to dinner and a movie. She said, “I love you, but I know this other woman loves you and would love to spend some time with you.” The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my mother, who … Read more
A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank.” Passenger: “Who?” Cabbie: “Frank Feldman… he’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened … Read more
A large woman, wearing a sleeveless sun dress, walks into a pub in Dublin She raises her right arm, revealing a huge hairy armpit. She points to all the people sitting at the bar and asks, “What man here will buy a lady a drink?”. The bar goes silent as the patrons try to ignore … Read more
Daughter’s text to Dad: Daddy, I’m coming home to get married soon, so get your checkbook ready. LOU As you know, I’m in Australia and he’s in the US. We met on a dating site, became friends on Facebook, and had long chats on Whatsapp. He proposed to me on Skype and now we’ve had … Read more
The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees was absent but had not phoned in sick. So he dialed the employee’s home phone number and was greeted with a child’s whisper. ‘ ‘Is your daddy home?’ ‘ Small voice whispered, ‘Yes, he’s out in the garden,’ ‘May I talk with him?’ The child … Read more