An elderly couple named Bill and Helen went to the county fair each year. One year, a man at the fair was giving helicopter rides for 50 dollars. Having never been in a helicopter in all his years, Bill begged Helen to let them ride. She refused, quipping “50 bucks is 50 bucks.” The following … Read more
A flight is on its way to Sydney, Australia when a blonde in economy class gets up, and moves to the first class section and sits down. The flight attendant watches her do this, and asks to see her ticket. She then tells the blonde that she paid for economy class, and that she will … Read more
A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies. Suddenly, at 3 O’clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside. The woman, sort of bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man “sh*t! That must be my husband!” So the guy quickly got out of bed scared and … Read more
The wife had faithfully attended to her husband for several months, never missing a day by his bedside. She watched over him, hoping and praying for a miracle, as he slipped in and out of consciousness. Finally, her persistence was rewarded when her husband’s eyes opened, and he weakly motioned for her to come closer. … Read more
A mother comes home from work to find that her kids are hiding behind the couch. She asks what’s wrong, and the kids reply that aunt Sally was in the house undressed. So she goes to her bedroom to investigate, and she finds her husband lying on the bed undressed and sweaty. She asks, “What’s … Read more
This is too good not to share. I asked a friend who has crossed 70 and is heading towards 80 what sort of changes he is feeling in himself? He sent me the following: 1. After loving my parents, my siblings, my spouse, my children and my friends, I have now started loving myself. 2. I have … Read more
An 18 year old girl tells her Mum that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the chemist and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says ‘who was the pig that did this to you? I … Read more
Little Johnny Fell In Love, so he asks his father. Son: “Daddy, I fell in love and want to date this awesome girl!” Father: “That’s a great son. Who is she?” Son: “It’s Sandra, the neighbor’s daughter” Father: “Ohhh I wish you hadn’t said that. I have to tell u something son, but you must … Read more
There are tons of recipes out there for homemade grout cleaner, but I wanted an effective one that wasn’t too hard to make. I ended up with this grout cleaner recipe which only has 2 ingredients, and it worked great! Homemade Grout Cleaner 30 minutes (time spent doing stuff) 15 minutes (time spent waiting around) … Read more
A 70-year-old man has never been married. One day, he meets a beautiful 17-year-old girl, and it is love at first sight. They get married and go to Florida for their honeymoon. When they get back, his friend says to him, “So, tell me, how was it?” “Oh, it was beautiful,” says the man. “The … Read more